The kickoff event for 3ABN’s Fall Camp Meeting was a question and answer session. There were a number of questions taken from the audience, and answered on live television by a panel of 3ABN presenters.
One of the questions was, Will there be marriage in heaven? Various answers were given. The best answer, in my opinion, was the one by Stephen Bohr. (I can’t quote him from memory, so if you missed it you’ll just have to order the DVD, or wait for a rerun.)
This is an interesting subject, one that the Bible gives us a little bit of information about, but not much. You can read the account of Jesus answering this question in Matthew 22:24-30 and Mark 12:19-25. I’m not aware of anywhere else in the Bible where marriage in the afterlife is discussed.
On the one face, Jesus’ answer is clear: “In the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage”; but on the other, it is a bit mysterious: they “are as the angels of God in heaven.” Now, what relationships do the angels of God in heaven enjoy? We don’t really know.
But there is a little bit more we can draw out from this. Many people are concerned that in heaven our sexuality will be stripped from us, and we will become (as they suppose) drones. As far as I know, there is no basis in the Bible for this conclusion. Some people consider angels to be sexless (and thus Jesus’ words above might be taken to imply a sexless future for humanity), but we do not know in detail what angels are like in their native forms, and the Bible does not comment on the matter. We don’t know if Jesus was even touching on biological or physiological aspects.
Consider this: It was God who created human sexuality. (Genesis 1:27.) Moreover, it says we were created in God’s image. There is nothing worldly or fallen about maleness and femaleness. Furthermore, it is God who created everything about human sexuality that makes it desirable. To think that God would take away something that He pronounced “very good” (Genesis 1:31) and replace it with something inferior does not make sense.
MARRIAGE IN THE NEW EARTH?
Some suppose that Jesus’ words apply to heaven only. That is, after the millennium in heaven, the saints will return to earth, and life will continue on with marriage and child-bearing just as before.
One problem with this view is that the question posed to Jesus was not about the millennium per se, but about how things would be in the afterlife, following the resurrection. That Jesus would give an answer that has only temporary significance (1000 years in heaven) does not make much sense.
I quote Ellen White (The Faith I Live By, 366): “There are men today who express their belief that there will be marriages and births in the new earth, but those who believe the Scriptures cannot accept such doctrines. The doctrine that children will be born in the new earth is not a part of the ’sure word of prophecy.’ The words of Christ are too plain to be misunderstood. They should forever settle the question of marriages and births in the new earth. Neither those who shall be raised from the dead, nor those who shall be translated without seeing death, will marry or be given in marriage. They will be as the angels of God, members of the royal family….
“The Lord has made every provision for our happiness in the future life. But He has made no revelations regarding these plans, and we are not to speculate concerning them. Neither are we to measure the conditions of the future life by the conditions of this life.”
NO NEW MARRIAGES?
Some have concluded that there will be no “new” marriages, but that existing unions would continue. Unfortunately this view, while appealing to those who are already married, does not carry much weight. First, it is directly contrary to the very situation that Jesus addressed in His answer about this subject, referenced above.
Also, it is not hard to see how this would be very difficult, even unfair, for everyone who was single in this life. Why should some enjoy marriage privileges for all eternity, while others — in many cases through no fault of their own (circumstances, poor genes, or martyrdom, for example) — are required to remain single for ceaseless ages? The continuance of human sexuality that this view presupposes makes the thought even more disagreeable.
MARRIED TO CHRIST?
Some take the view that the mystical union between ourselves and Jesus, described in the Bible as marriage, takes the place of human marriage (for examples of this language, see Isaiah 62:4-5; Jeremiah 3:14; Matthew 22:1-14; Matthew 25:1-13; Romans 7:4; 2 Corinthians 11:2; Ephesians 5:23-32; Revelation 19:7-9; 21:2, 9). While this view carries an aura of super-spirituality, it falls flat in answering the issue at hand.
First, Jesus did not give this as His answer. He could have said, “Because everyone will be married to me!” But instead He said we will be as the angels of God in heaven. Nowhere does the Bible describe the angels as being married to Jesus.
Second, the metaphor of marriage is just that — a metaphor, just as the related language of the body of believers as the bride is a metaphor (we will not be literally one body). Along with this idea of metaphor, is the idea conveyed by many of the verses referenced above, that Jesus is married to the church, not to each individual believer (even though there are a couple verses that, taken alone, might seem to say that). Otherwise we are saying that Jesus is a polygamist on an incomprehensible order of magnitude. Over and over again the Bible personifies the body of believers as one body, one bride, married to Christ. And of course, it should go without saying that this union is not asexual union, but spiritual. Anyone who tries to say that human marriage, even among the best of Christians, is strictly a spiritual union is kidding themselves. And it seems clear that this idea of sexual union, of marital privileges, is precisely the question Jesus addressed in Matthew 22 and Mark 12, not the spiritual union of various lovers.
Those who say with an air of deep spirituality that in heaven we will be married to Christ, and that this will fill the place of human marriage, are making a grave mistake. The kind of relationship between Christ and His people does not satisfy the needs or nature of human sexuality, which is really the basis of human marriage. To Adam, the Creator did not offer Himself, but Eve. I hope I don’t offend anyone by saying that, but platonic or spiritual unions are not Christian marriage. Friendship is not marriage. Devotion is not marriage. Love is not marriage. Human marriage is all of that, combined with human sexuality. And it is a mistake to reassure someone that, no problem, with human marriage gone, Jesus will take that place. We have no reason to believe that He will.
CONCLUSIONS
1 Corinthians 2:9 says, “Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.” The God who made us what we are, has prepared for our eternal happiness. He has not spelled out the details. He has given us some cautions so that we don’t move rashly or with false hopes. We can be sure that whatever awaits us will be worth waiting for.